Don’t let the title get you down: this is a rocket space car first. The barf only comes as a result of our weak human stomachs.
You may have heard that the P85D does 0-60 in 3.1 seconds but then Tesla lovingly came out with an over-the-air software update that gave people “ludicrous” mode and whittled that number down to 2.7. That’s very quick to 60 mph by nearly any standard. One thing you must understand, however is that this car will go 0-40mph in 1.5 seconds. That’s not acceleration. That’s gunfire. There’s your puke party. When you floor it from a stand-still it really feels like you’re being launched into space.
If you’re into internet you’ve probably seen The Oatmeal’s take on the Model S. It’s an impressive tribute from a self proclaimed non-car guy. It’s a bit crude and boils down to asking Elon Musk for a donation to his Nikola Tesla museum but he does bring some some very good points. One of which is the singularity this car shoves in our faces: you don’t need to burn gasoline to get around. This seemingly obvious fact has been challenged unsuccessfully for about 100 years and Tesla is the first one to really pull it off. That’s pretty darn impressive when you consider a few global brands have given it a shot.
And did you know the Model S can carry 7 people!? Pretty insane, although it’s not 7 full-sized adults, it’s bringing flex seating back station wagon style.
The final 2 seats are more kid-sized but when you’re hauling 7 people around chances are some of them are going to be sub-100 pounders. Although this seems like a risky proposition you can rest easy knowing that the Model S is the only car to get a 5 star safety rating on every test and the only car to break the machine trying to test how strong it is.
If you’ve ever wanted the coolness of having a trunk up front without the mid-engine price, Tesla is for you. Just look at this front trunk! You can put things in there and fulfill every single one of your childhood dreams.
If you were wondering about the name, the 85 part stands for the wattage of the motor and the D part stands for “dual” motors, as in one for the front and one for the rear. What helps the P85D achieve it’s “ludicrous” acceleration is the fact that it’s all-wheel drive, which helps in the snow, too.
The central screen that controls the climate, radio, and settings can only be described as super gigantic. It’s the focal point of the interior because you pretty much can’t see anything else.
Controls are easy to find and it’s fairly straightforward to operate but it’s a little scary trusting so much to a touch screen when you’re used to physical nobs. It’s nice to grab something of substance when you’re too warm or want to change the station if more of that hipster garbage music comes on.
One advantage, however, to all the software business is that Tesla can make your car cooler overnight while you’re sleeping. In addition to making it accelerate faster they can make your car self-driving. And have. All of a sudden Model S’ss’ around the nation were updated with a “semi-autonomous” function where if you pull back twice on the cruise control lever it will guide itself down your current path, hands free, feet free. It’s mentally straining to let the car take over but it’s magical golden joy sauce when it works. It’s sort of unbelievable. You’re supposed to keep your hands lightly on the wheel, however, even in this semi-auto mode. It’s not perfect I guess but in my experience using it I was very impressed and found myself trusting it’s abilities more and more. All hail our new overlord: the mythical blue lines of semi-autonomous driving.
Facts about this car that actually matter to anyone wanting one:
- Price for the good one: $130k
- Range: claimed 280 miles, real world: 220
- Time to full charge at home: 8 hrs
- Time to 80% charge at supercharger: 45 min
- Charging port: painfully cool that they located INSIDE the taillight. A section swings open to reveal a glowing electro-snake receptacle.
So while the P85D is way out of reach for the lay person, it’s proof that the electric car is not only possible, but it can be luxurious and fun. While some people may have thought he Model X was going to be the Tesla available to the average working American, this model is actually identical to the Model S in drivetrain and costs a bit more. Sorry, folks.
Good news, though: many people anxiously await the Model 3 which is claimed to arrive in 2017 at a starting price in the $30k neighborhood. If Tesla can deliver on a car that’s even 1/4 as good as the Model S for 1/4 the price I think they’ll have a winner. Especially if the range is anywhere near the 300 mile mark.
Really enjoyed this article. I didn’t much about this car but feel like I do now. Sitting backwards would make me barf I think. Hope they got good barf resistant carpets and upholstery.